My Aunt Star

Frequently in therapy my therapist will ask me to close my eyes and look inside for the part of me that won't judge myself. The part of me that will thank myself for the hard work I'm doing. It's hard for me to do this, it's hard for me to see myself as that person within myself. So, I started imagining someone else. At first it was just a light. A bright light that would speak to my inner self. Then I realized there was a person there, it was my Aunt Star. My Aunt Star would speak to my inner self and remind me of how strong I was, how far I've come, how hard I've worked.

My Aunt Star is a beautiful woman. My uncle and grandparents lived in Florida growing up and I remember every time we went down to visit, she had little gifts for us and loved spending time with us. She was always so sweet and kind and liked to do sleepovers with my sister and I. To this day she is still the same beautiful woman. She is a wonderful host and when I go to visit her and my uncle, she ensures that I am well taken care of. She has the kindest voice and you can always tell that she is truly listening when you speak. She gives amazing hugs that convey how much she loves me.

I feel truly grateful to have her in my life and now to know that she is inside me at all times reminding me of how strong I am, it warms my heart. I couldn't go without sharing how beautiful of a woman and how special she is.

I love you Aunt Star!

"These 20 Questions Will Improve Your Self-Awareness"

I'm taking this from an article that a friend sent, which you can find at the following link:

http://dariusforoux.com/selfawareness/

I'm going to give it a stab and see if I can learn a bit more about myself! :)

1. What am I good at? I'm good at listening, I'm good at my job, I'm good at caring about others, I'm detail-oriented
2. What am I so-so at? Exercising, eating well, budgeting
3. What am I bad at? Relaxing!
4. What makes me tired? Stress makes me exhausted. Fighting.
5. What is the most important thing in my life? Happiness
6. Who are the most important people in my life? My family, friends, my dog!
7. How much sleep do I need? Lately, 8 hours.
8. What stresses me out? Easily stressed by too many obligations, tight deadlines, money, conflicts with others
9. What relaxes me? Yoga, reading, watching movies/TV
10. What’s my definition of success? Being happy! Being financially stable, in a job I enjoy. 
11. What type of worker am I? Very hard worker! 
12. How do I want others to see me? I want others to see me as a kind, understanding, happy, dedicated person.
13. What makes me sad? When I fight with those I love, when I feel like I'm losing control, when others are in pain
14. What makes me happy? Feeling like I have succeeded at something, being with my family, spending time with my husband, my dog
15. What makes me angry? Other people most of the time! If I feel someone is trying to be difficult or is making a situation difficult. Myself - I definitely get angry at myself!
16. What type of person do I want to be? I want to be the person that others can count on. I want to be stable and feel good about myself.
17. What type of friend do I want to be? Reliable, always there for you.
18. What do I think about myself? I think I'm still a work in progress. I have good things but there are still a lot of things I need to improve on.
19. What things do I value in life? I value family, relationships, giving back.
20. What makes me afraid? Change, I hate change. Money scares me. The feeling that I may not succeed at something.

I tried to not over think this as I answered the questions as that is something I have a tendency to do. I wanted to give my immediate thoughts and see what I came up with. I see a lot of consistency. I want to be everything to everyone but I don't necessarily think about myself. Interesting... The post says I shouldn't interpret my responses. I should just start working on the things that I said I'm bad at and try to improve my life. I think that's much easier said (written) than done! I do like the idea of immediately doing the things I identify that make me happy! :)